In Which I Drop Some Honesty, With Gifs

This is going to be one of those "honest" posts.  I'll inter-cut it with gifs to keep you reading.

it's feelings singing time.

I'm sure this comes as absolutely no surprise to the scores of people who read this blog (Hi Amber!), but I've been feeling very uninspired lately.  Call it a rut, though it's been lasting a long, long time.  I've even started a few posts-- one about the amazing Postal Service concert I went to last month that I accidentally referred to as a Rilo Kiley concert because I was so into seeing Jenny Lewis, one about books I've read that I was excited about, one about Book Expo America 2013 where there were no star penises but there were tons of laughs and excellent books-- but I've finished exactly none of them.  With the Postal Service one, I was mentally writing it the entire way back home from Merriwether Post Pavilion, thinking about how excited I was to get it all down and how it would be fun to blog again, and then I came home, opened the laptop, and... nothing.  The excitement, the words, the fire-- they all drained out of me in an instant.

much like Dean's coffee

This rutful feeling doesn't just cover my personal blog life.  I haven't written a review for WPP in about a month, despite the fact that I have read some books worth reviewing (in case you're curious, Winger by Andrew Smith and the upcoming Fire With Fire by Richmond native and general awesome lady Jenny Han and her bestie and general awesome lady Siobhan Vivian).  I didn't notice it until I went to update my spreadsheet of Books Read in 2013 yesterday (yes I have a spreadsheet you shut your mouth), and this is the first time I've finished a book since June 19 (thank you, audiobook for Outlander).  I've started a bunch, but they're all in limbo.  That's very rare for me, especially the me of the past few years.

this is how i usually feel about books

Part of it, I know, is burnout.  Writing reviews is hard, y'all.  Especially now, because I know what I like, and I'm growing increasingly tired of reading books that don't compel me.  Being a reviewer means that sometimes you have to slog through a story that you do not care about in the slightest.  I could mark it as DNF (that's Did Not Finish for you folks playing at home), but I really, really hate doing that.  I don't judge someone for it, but I want to finish what I start.  So, when I start a new YA book, and I'm immediately smacked in the face by 14 of the same tropes I've seen in the last 50 books I've read, I just can't imagine going on any further.  I don't want to.

presented w/o comment

There are exceptions to the above.  I've been "reading" this one book since I took the train home from BEA.  It's a short book, and I could've easily finished it on the train, but I reached a certain point where I knew the story was going to break me up inside, so I put it down to finish at a later date.  Now, it sits on my dresser, staring at me, willing me to finish, and I'm too scared and/or sad to find out what happens.  What even is that about?

what IS up, j.law?

I've also been trying to write more since I got back from BEA.  Hanging with the authorly types (especially the talented, passionate, creative authorly types who happen to be my friends) showed me that this is what I want to do.  I want to tell the stories I've carried around for so, so long.  I want to get them out of me and on paper and into the world.  But it's the same as the blog thing.  In fact, just yesterday as I walked home from the metro, I started hearing snippets of conversation in my head, and I knew which characters were speaking.  I couldn't wait to get home and get this out, let these two characters share this nonsensical conversation and reconnect.  However, I get home, complete my Getting Home routine, and when I finally sit down, I actually fall asleep.  I could have picked the story up at any point in the evening, with more than enough happy wishes from Hubs (and begrudging shrugs from the Mutt Who Really Just Wants Belly-Rubs), but instead?  I watch super mindless TV and then catch up on other less mindless TV.  Granted, I was spending time with Hubs and Mutt, which is always a blessing and happy-making time for me, but then I start thinking... How badly do I actually want this?  Not bad enough to look away from Exes Wipeout, apparently.

Okay, so this is a lot more honest than I intended, but it's already out so it's staying.

ugh, the accuracy.

My point is, I'm in a rut.  I'm doing my best to break out of it, but it's like my brain is floating in molasses.  It's like I'm caught in suspension, but not in the good way that it sounds like in the Mae song.  I'm just here.  And I don't know how to do anything more than exist right now.  It's got to be me that breaks out of this cycle, but I don't know how to do it.

I'm not asking for your sympathy, and, unless the advice is something magical, I'm not asking for that either. I'm simply stating my facts right now as I see them.  Frankly, it feels kinda good to get them out of me.  Maybe this is what I needed all along, to get these negative nellie vibes out of my brain so that space can be taken up by, like, more song lyrics or, you know, PLOT FOR A BOOK I SHOULD BE WRITING.  I know what I need to do to break free of this, but (and this will be the dumbest thing I've ever said) it's hard to do the hard thing.  But that's what I need to do.  Here's hoping I stop being scared and just freaking DO IT already.

asking life's important question

Anyway, thanks for reading, if you're all the way here.  You right there?  You're my favorite.

The Army of Ten

You might have noticed the new button the sidebar over there.  No, not there.  There.  I recently joined the Army... of Ten.

The Army of Ten is a promotional street team to support and (obviously) promote awesome author Gretchen McNeil.  Her latest book, Ten, releases in about 27 days.  We're trying to get the word out to go to your local indie bookstore (or even your favorite online bookseller) and get yourself a copy of September 18!

I read Gretchen's previous book Possess, and I was a big fan!  It's classified as YA horror, which most of you know isn't really my game, but I had heard too many good things to pass it up.  It's engaging and fun and CREEPY as can be.  From all I've heard, Ten sounds like it'll be even creepier, so I can't wait to pick it up.

The other reason I joined The Army of Ten?  Well, even though I've never had the pleasure of meeting Gretchen in person, she's been very sweet to me over the tweets and such, and she's about the third person I've ever met who remembers the 80s classic Misfits of Science.  Therefore, she rules.

SO, on September 18, head on down to your local indie and pick up a copy of Gretchen's creepfest Ten.  If it's not there, then go to the desk and request it.  Then tell your friends to buy it!  One friends tells another tells another, and then it's like a pyramid scheme, only legal and WAY more fun!

Click on the button in the side dooblydoo to find out more.  We are The Army of Ten!

That Time I Met John Green at BEA aka Why Can't Jessica Shut Her Yapper?

I am a storyteller.  It's one of the major reasons I blog.  I feel I have a lot of good stories, and I enjoy sharing them.  What follows is a story of epic proportions, one that I will not be able to replicate in awesomeness for a long, long time.  Buckle up and prepare for what will forever be known as...

The Star Penis story.

It's been clearly stated on this blog that I am a John Green fangirl, or rather, a nerdfighter.  If you are a nerdfighter, you know that John's son Henry LOVES sing-a-ma-jigs, and they have made their way into the vlogbrothers videos and thus into vlogbrothers lexicon.  On our recent trip to Japan, I found a miniature sing-a-ma-jig, so I bought it to give to John at BEA.  Of course, I didn't snap a picture of it before this happened, but essentially, it looks like this.

It should also be noted that the one I got in Japan had a couple of tags on it, specifically a purple star-shaped tag RIGHT in the sing-a-ma-jig's... nether regions.  Hubs stated to me on multiple occasions that I should make sure to point out what he called the sing-a-ma-jig's Star Penis to John Green.  Then, he would giggle.  A lot.

Fast forward a few weeks, and I'm at BEA, Day 1.  It's a madhouse of books and totes and people and Gandalf for President buttons, and I'm loving every second of it.  At one point, I'm waiting in line to get a book signed, and JOHN GREEN himself walks right past me.  I shout, "OmiGOD it's John Green!" and proceed to stare at him.  Unabashedly.  With my mouth wide open.  Frozen to the spot.

Smooth.

That afternoon, I walk through the Penguin booth, and there he is again.  John Green out in the wild like a normal person who does normal things.  I figure, this is my chance to make up for the silent staring moment, so I wait patiently for John to finish his conversation.  And then this happens:

Printz Award Winning Author: (leaning toward bag on table) I bet you want me to sign that for you.

Me: No, I just want you to have it. (holds sing-a-ma-jig out toward PAWA like a talisman)

PAWA: (slightly shocked) Really?  That's so nice.

Me: (excitedly and without abandon) My husband would like me to point out to you that since it has that star tag on its crotch, it looks like it has a little star penis.

Yes, my friends.  That is a direct quote from my mouth to John Green's ears.  Not, "Hello, it's nice to meet you."  Not, "I am such an ardent admirer of your books."  Not, "The Fault in Our Stars is one of the most amazing novels I've ever read, and it affects me even months after I read it."

Nope.  I said star penis.

Thankfully, he laughs out loud (LOLed, if you will) and agrees with me.  THEN, he TAKES THE VLOGBROTHERS CAMERA out of his bag and RECORDS MY PRESENT.  THEN HE RECORDS MY FACE.  My initial reaction is to half-cover my face and say, "Oh, it's not going to be in the video, is it?"  to which John's editor, the incomparable Julie Strauss-Gabel hilariously replies, "You really brought this on yourself, you know."

I am such a nerdfighter that I fangirl Julie Strauss-Gabel.

My new BFF John and I share a few more laughs involving him being a Jeffrey Eugenides silent starer, the John Green/Chris Colfer fanfic and how nothing is sacred, and the Author Breakfast the next morning, and then I get a picture with him.

Thank you Susan for capturing the moment so perfectly.

When he put his arm around me to pose, I lose the little bit of cool I've been able to maintain up to this moment because I know how much John Green does not like to touch people, and my hands start shaking uncontrollably.  In fact, they're shaking so much so that I've never been so aware of anything except that he must be aware of it.  Because I'm crazy like that.  So, I smile and thank him and then I RUN LIKE THE WIND from that spot.  Why?

Because I don't want him to see me doing this:

Yeah.

So that's my story.  Hopefully, you'll see my nerdy mug on John's video on Tuesday, but if not, I still think I'll be dining out on this one for years to come.

UPDATE:
The video has been posted.  And I think the 1:30 mark speaks for itself.

In conclusion, I think I'm dead.  Holy smokes.  French the llama.  

"The darkest clouds seem to be gathering right above my building, so I assume that's where Zuul is."

It's a scary rainy near-apocalypse outside right now.  I tweeted the title of this entry to Sarah Enni once she mentioned the tornado warning(!!!).  She responded WE'RE NOT READY.  I did this at my desk.

I'll be out of town all next week at Book Expo America (more commonly known as BEA).  This is my first time attending this conference, and I am WICKED EXCITED to go!  To entertain you while I am away, I leave you the following videos.


The Lizzie Bennet Diaries!  A great web series turning Lizzie Bennet into a video blogger.  I love all version of Pride & Prejudice, but this one is so original and fun.  I love it.



The latest vlogbrothers video!  Which, if you don't find this funny, then a- you shouldn't watch any more vlogbrothers videos and b- we MAY not be able to be friends.  Also, you should click on the Outtakes video link that pops up at the end.



Dan Bern singing Tiger Woods aka the song that's been stuck in my head all day.  This is kind of a silly warning, but some of the words to this song have been deemed "inappropriate for daytime hours" by the former student managers of my college radio station, so... now you know.



The teaser trailer for Les Miserables.  Look, there's a lot of controversy among Les Mis fans about this trailer, mostly surrounding Anne Hathaway's singing.  Personally, I love it.  I have yet to make it through a viewing of this trailer without getting a bit verklempt.  Also, I have yet to look at this picture without loudly singing, "Valjean at laaast we see each other plain..."

Get More: Movie Trailers, Movies Blog

The newest trailer for Magic Mike aka the movie that needs no plot.  I mean... honestly.

AND you're welcome.

Why I Love Being Called a Nerd aka Thank You, John Green

Two quotes (and the videos in which they appear) from the incomparable John Green about why I value and embrace my nerdiness.


"Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”



"...nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff!  We don't have to be like, 'Oh yeah, that purse is okay,' or like, 'Yeah, I like that band's early stuff.'  Nerds are allowed to love stuff, like jump-up-and-down-in-the-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. Hank, when people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘you like stuff,’ which is just not a good insult at all. Like, ‘you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness’.”

Top Ten Favorite Childhood Books

There is a meme created by The Broke and The Bookish called Top Ten Tuesday.  Every Tuesday, they ask YA book bloggers to post their Top Ten of whatever that week's theme is.  This week's theme is Top Ten Childhood Favorites (which, incidentally, was the *first* TTT theme, so they reposted it since they thought more people would participate this time around).  In reading the many different lists, I was inspired to post my own.  SO, without further ado and in no particular order, here are my Top Ten Favorite Books From My Childhood.

1. Tuck Everlasting

Holy crap, I love this book like it's my job.  I've read it more times than I can remember.  Thinking back, this story has probably influenced  my current reading habits much more than I ever realized.  Even in elementary school, I adored how (mild spoiler alert) it ends on kind of a downer, and yet it's still so hopeful.

2. The Baby-Sitters Club

Oh, I read them all.  Every single one.  Every book, every special edition, every anthology, even every Baby-Sitters Little Sister.  I even owned the game pictured.  I bet it's still at my parents' house in my closet right now.  I may or may not have tried to get my parents to take me on a trip to Stoneybrook, CT as well.  (P.S. it's not real so don't ask.)  My personal favorite was Stacey because she was super fashionable and she lived in Manhattan and dotted her i's and lower case j's with hearts.  However, I always loved that Mary Anne, the plainest girl in the eternal 8th grade, was able to bag a hottie like Logan Bruno.  Good for you, girl!

3. Sweet Valley Twins, more specifically Jessica's New Look

Obviously, this Jessica was a huge fan of the Wakefield twins, seeing as one of them has my name and all.  Why this one in particular?  Well, much like my girl Jessica, I also had to get glasses.  However, this book came out about 2 years before my glasses initiation, but I always knew it wasn't far away.  I must have read this one a billion times.  Freakin' glasses.

4. The Secret Garden

I distinctly remember this being one of the first books that wasn't a school summer list read or a BSC/Sweet Valley book that I chose myself.  I just started reading it on a whim, and I couldn't stop.  It's where my love of the UK began, frankly.  I wanted to live in a big manor house out in the English countryside with beautiful gardens and foggy moors and a dude named Dickon to teach me about animals.  And also a really demanding cousin.  Have you ever seen the 1993 movie?  It's amazing.  Dame Maggie Smith is in it, and she rules.  My mom also took me to see the musical when the touring company came to Richmond.

5. Bridge to Terabithia

Truly, truly, truly one of my favorite books on the planet still to this very moment.  I first read this in the 4th or 5th grade, and I swear I cried in class because I was so wrapped up in the characters.  This was the very first book that made me realize just how much words can affect your heart.  Amazing.

6. From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler

I mean, come on.  This one just sells itself in title alone.

7. Wayside School is Falling Down

This is the silliest book ever, and that's why I adore it.  In a complete turnabout of my usual character, I read this without having first read Sideways Stories From Wayside School (aka the first book).  However, that didn't really matter.  I would still rock a shirt that says, "Star Bringing Purple!"

8. A Light In The Attic

I seriously cannot choose my favorite poem.  Everyone loves Shel.

9. The Monster at the End of this Book

My dad used to read this one to me all the time, and his voice would get progressively higher and more nervous and it was hilarious.  He's not a big reader at all, but he always read to us.  That's important.

AND FINALLY
10. Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret

All girls of a certain age have read this.  Fact.  I think it's like required.  It's terrifying in its description of maxi pads on belts.  BELTS. WHAT DID THOSE GIRLS LIVE THROUGH? Oh, I'm still totally wigged out.

What about you?  What are your favorite books from childhood?

Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs

I read the awesomely amazing Chuck Klosterman book featured in the title of this entry circa 2003, and I called my brother when I was on page 4 to say, "You must read this book."  The below quote was just posted on Facebook, and it is yet another reminder of why both this book and Chuck Klosterman are THE BEST (and why I loved JMU).

"There are no 'fashion don'ts' inside the Mainstreet Bar & Grill in downtown Harrisonburg.  You want to inexplicably wear a headband?  Fine.  You want to wear a FUBU sweatshirt with a baseball hat that features the Confederate flag?  No problem.  This is the kind of place where you see a college girl attempting to buy a $2.25 glass of Natural Light on tap with her credit card-- and have her card denied."

News, Everyone!

I am officially a reviewer at Wastepaper Prose!  I'm pretty excited about it, because now I have another writing outlet AND it's an excuse to read more books.  My first review is up at the site (spoiler alert: interesting but not my favorite).  Also, check out the How I Know Susan entry before it (just for the background info on how two former classmates use the internet to realize we still exist) and my bio.

Weeeeee!